Pages

Friday, August 29, 2008

25th hour...but like, in a good way...kinda

So it's my last night in California for a while...and I spent more than a little of it considering how different this place seems to me now and taking stock of all the people and things I will miss. I will miss my friends, and I will miss having a big sky over my head, as that will soon be replaced with little blue scraps bordered by concrete and glass. To an extent, I will miss the irresponsibility that comes with total dependence, but I will not miss the illusion of stability and stagnation which I have come to realize for what it is. The world has continued spinning while I've been at home, and my life was not put on hold when I returned. Perhaps I could have done more with my time, but these three months meant a great deal, and I have learned and seen and done many things in that time. I think for the first time I've been emboldened by my summer experience, and rather than grasping desperately at my remaining time here I find myself eager to take the next step and return to the work I now see in a different light. Plus there's a pretty girl I'm anxious to see again, so that's going to help the transition I think.

I'm going to miss my parents. I spent a good deal of time with them this summer, and especially in Europe I felt like I was part of a family - not due in any part to the simple (but rather rare) proximity of the three total members of our nuclear family, but rather because of the experiences we were sharing, the reassurance of their familiar personalities in foreign places, and the respect for and pride in each other that we all shared. My parents are truly honorable, amazing people, and my respect for them grows daily. They shaped who I have become, but also gave me the immeasurably valuable ability to think for myself and live my own life. They gave me my life, not simply biologically but intellectually as well. They gave me the ability to think, which is rarer perhaps than one might believe.

While I've said already that I'm going to miss my friends, I think there's a place for them in my future even larger than the one they have in my past, and I'm anxious to share my life with them and have many adventures, because life's too damn short to spend being bored.

The next step begins now.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

also you should come up to boston cauz my new pad is sweet brb

Anonymous said...

fucking commune bitches...